Plate Breaking - Opa!

• Stephanie Amber Englebert – Plate broken October 12, 2002, Green Bay, WI
• Stephanie Elaine Burleson – Plate broken March 26, 2003, Joplin, MO
• Victoria Alexandria Burleson – Plate broken July 22, 2005, Joplin, MO (Pictures forever lost when digital camera was stolen)
• April Rose Englebert – Plate broken September 28, 2007, Joplin, MO

Many people have asked us what a plate-breaking ceremony is and where it came from. As a child, growing up in a large family, my parents always said that on our 18th birthday they were going to break our dinner plate. They never actually broke one of mom's dinner plates but that was the end of the parental gravy train. As our children grew, we told them that we were going to break their dinner plates just like my parents had done. Of course, we actually did!

Plate-breaking is actually quite common in many cultures - Greek, German, Jewish and Iranian just to name a few. In Greece, plates are often broken on special occasions or during celebrations. The broken plates symbolize good luck, abundance and happiness. My favorite symbolism is the Jewish tradition where the mother-in-laws of a couple about to marry smash plates symbolizing the impending break in their relationships with their children who are about to take responsibility for feeding each other.

Modern culture tends to downplay the importance of the rites of passage that mark our transition from one life stage to another, but they are as important as ever. Rituals and ceremonies feed our spirits, making our lives richer and deeper. Our rites connect us life to life and generation to generation.

In traditional societies, it has long been accepted that young people need a rite of passage and the guidance of wise elders to ease them through the transition from childhood to adulthood. Our family chooses to celebrate that transition with a plate-breaking ceremony to symbolically represent our child leaving their childhood behind and venturing into the unknown adult world where they will be responsible for themselves.

The “plate breaking ceremony” is filled with family, fun, laughter and a few tears. A celebration plate, decorated with sayings like “Childhood…When you know where your next meal is coming from”, “Smile For Your Supper” and “No Free Food”, is presented to the child. After a nice family meal (jokingly referred to as “The Last Meal”), the child and plate is taken outside. No child willing gives up the dinner plate! After being told "You are an adult now. From now on, everything we give you is because we love you not because we have to", the plate is smashed!

The celebration continues with cake, ice cream, and gifts. One of the special gifts that we give to each child is a “Book of Wisdom”. Basically, this is a note card binder containing 3x5 cards with witty or wise advice on them from the “elders” in our family. The sayings can be funny, somber, pithy…whatever suits the giver’s style. The only rule is that you must be 18 or older to contribute a bit of wisdom!

Celebrating the beginning of adulthood with the hope that it will be full of good luck, abundance and much happiness: Opa!!